Sunday, October 11, 2009 ; 1:57 PM {♥}
MOVED, DARLINGS.
so you should move too.
Next stop, www.thedopoj.blogspot.com, where life just gets worse.
it's time to move your asses now.
Labels: diary
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, June 27, 2009 ; 12:06 PM {♥}
I AM BACK!
yay for me!
Wakaka. Just returned home at 3 in the morning. Then when I woke up at 9, decided to return Ms. Fang's call and guess what?
I am to be quarantined for 7 days :D Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Haha, I will kind of miss going to school with bin and gang but then... now I have time to finish my homework!
Dropping the quarantine subject, HONGKONG & MACAU was fab! I might be posting pictures but don't count on it. I still owe bins and mins some pictures after all. So anyway, shall relate to everybody my HONGKONG & MACAU experience :D
Day One 22/06/09
Woke up at around 8 in the morning and started on some last-minute packing. Haha, was searching for sufficient underclothes actually :D It was my first budget airlines experience and I thought it was okay. Except the budget terminal is so small and pathetic with only a Han's and a Macdonalds. It really looks the job. It is after all, a budget terminal. We were discussing lunch plans while having breakfast at Mac's. It appears that budget airlines have really expensive food, and I'm only talking about cup noodles. Mum wanted to sneak in some sandwiches but Daddy and I didn't really want to have to sneak around just to eat. Turns out our worries were unfounded. The people on the plane brought their own food and were all eating right under the stewardess' noses. Like seriously. They even brought an assortment of food ranging from fruits (e.g. grapes) to desserts (e.g. cakes, kueh lapis etc...). Nobody said anything about them so in the end we all ate Mum's sandwiches =.= After a four hour flight of sleeping with trombone concertos blasting throught my mp3, we finally arrived!
So, first stop... Ole London Hotel. It was actually pretty decent for a two-star hotel, being newly renovated and all. Everything was new and even though it was small, it was nice. I especially loved their television because it sports about 100+ channels. I was totally hooked on to their japanese tv shows with chinese subs. Really interesting and funny. And I even saw this... the anime Gokusen with... wtf?! Hokkien dubs?! It was really funny to watch because it sounded like ****. I can't really find words to describe, just really horrible. So anyway, we dropped our luggage and made our way to Tai Sam Pa - the ruins of Saint Paul's cathedral. On the way we shopped around through the streets and I found it amazing because they can have the same biscuit shop with like 5 branches and more on that one street. Tough competition >:D The church ruins were pretty awesome. Very grand and nice even though it's like old. We even visited a grave. After shopping around somemore we went back to the hotel and refreshed ourselves with a bath before heading out to find food. In the end dinner was settled at some roadside noodle store. The food was not bad and I didn't see any roaches or anything so I assumed it should be safe. Felt kinda cool eating there cause it feels like you were in a HongKong drama :D
Day Two 23/06/09
Today we were heading to HongKong! Left the hotel early in the morning to embark towards the macau jetty. Enjoyed my first Macau bus trip. It was okay, kind of like Singapore's transitlink buses. Anyway, passed by quite a number of Casinos O.O The boat that we sat on was pretty cool. The inside of the boat is like a plane and they have like stewardesses too. Except maybe they're not called air stewardesses anymore. Anyway, the fare is about 30 + SGD? It took one whole hour to reach but I was sleeping so it was okay. When we arrived we went straight to HongKong's MTR (Singapore calls it the MRT) and bought one day travel passes. With those equipped, it was straight to HONGKONG DISNEYLAND!
Disneyland has their own train station called the Disney Resort Station. It's on a seperate line and that line and is the only station on that line. At the interchange, I got a shock because the train that came was seriously a disney train. IT IS THE MOST AWESOMEST TRAIN I HAVE EVER SAT IN MY LIFE. They have like velvet cushioned seats and the windows are in the shape mickey's head. and they have many disney characters' bronze statues displayed in glass cases. Even the handle bars that hang from above and mickey-shaped. It feels totally magical inside and you feel like a kid all over again. Everyone, and I mean everyone, started camwhoring the minute they boarded the train. The Disney train station is also pretty cool. It looks like it jumped straight out of Kingdom Hearts. Anyway, you have to walk quite a long way to get disneyland from the station but it was kind of exciting walking there while listening to the disney songs blasting from those lamposts. It was freaking hot but it didn't put anyone down. The disney souveniers are really cute and fantastic I felt like buying the whole shop home. I totally regret not saving up more money to get myself something T.T
Disneyland is totally awesome even though it's really kiddish. There aren't any exciting rides but it is still fun because there are tons of shows to watch. We head straight to Sleeping Beauty's Castle fist because Mum complained that even though she went to 2 Disneylands already, she never made it to the castle. So well, we warmed-up first with that Dumbo kids ride. Saw many little caucasians sporting fancy dresses and cosplaying as the disney princesses :D They look so cute. It started raining soon after we got off Dumbo so we ran for shelter. We were just lucky to run into Mickey's Philharmagic performance just right on showtime. It was quite cool because I got to see french horns and trombones :D Haha, it's actually a 4D show like the one in movieworld except it's not shrek but it's with mickey and gang. I really liked it. It was really cute. Haha :D Then after we came out the rain stopped for awhile so we decided to move on to adventureland because we thought it would be more exciting there.
So we went to take the jungle river cruise :D It was kind of like some role-playing game. You go for a ride with the tour guide but you end up getting lost in some unknown part of the river kinf od storyline but seriously, our tour guide had lousy acting skills so it didn't feel the least bit exciting. Still, the river tour was kind of cool. There was a part at the back where we got stuck in some volcano place and real fire totally burst out from the rocks nearby. It was totally hot but cool at the same time. Then when we came out it started raining heavily again so we went to the restaurant opposite for lunch. Lunch was good and not as expensive as I thought it would be. The set meal was like 15 SGD person and it was extremely filling. I felt like I could die from overeating. It was still drizzling when we finished so we decided to go back to fantasyland (sleeping beauty's castle area) to watch more shows indoors. Was hoping to catch winnie the pooh adventures but they were undergoing some uppgrading so we went to "it's a small world" for a spin. Quite interesting to watch but also a little boring. Because it's just moving and singing puppets from different countries.
Next stop was Tomorrowland. Went to try out the only exciting ride they have there- Space Mountain. It's a high speed rollercoaster in the dark so you can't see where you are going. The only light around you are little dots of light that are supposed to be stars. I was so scared because it sounded scary but it's actually not as good as scoobydoo. I kept anticipating a really steep slope but it never came. It's just really fast that's all. So that ended in a blink of an eye. After that, we went to watch stitch's encounter. It's quite interesting and funny because it's an interactive show where you can talk to stitch and play games. The conversation between stitch and the little kids were funny. Then we went to sit the Buzz Lightyear astro blasters. It was quite fun because it a game where you sit on the car and you get a gun to shoot the monsters around you. I took turns with my mum to use the gun because my gun malfunctioned and didn't work. Dad got an imba high score that tripled ours =.=. I think it's because he had NS training. Also tried out the Autopia driving game which is actually quite lame because the car can move on it own even if you don't drive it. The only thing you can control is the speed of the car and when to stop and start.
Thereafter we watched a short water parade on the streets where the disney characters go around splashing water at you and making you wet. Thank goodness for umbrellas. Next was the Golden Mickeys Musical which is absolutely fantastic. It was really amusing and I like recorded the whole thing down. Haha, just for future reference though. The live singing and dancing was extremely fun to watch. Our last stop was supposed to be visiting the Tarzan tree house but when we came out of the tree house the festival of the lion king show opened its doors for us. That show was nice too except halfway through it got interrupted and that's kind of like =.= you know. It killed the excitement.
After we left disneyland, we went to Mongkok Ladies Market which is near our hotel. I didn't really see any nice shops which was quite a dissapointment but Cotton On was having this huge sale and I bought quite alot of things from there. We were all extemely exhausted from disneyland so we hurried to the hotel to get refreshed. By the end of the day, it felt like my legs could break.
Day Three 24/06/09
Had breakfast at this restaurant nearby. Hurray for Dim Sum! Today is Ocean Park day! I was quite excited about it. We had to take a bus there and it was quite a long journey. I was kind of tired but my dad was telling me that this will not be as tiring as disneyland because we will be watching alot of animal shows. Yeah right, not tiring my ass. The stupid ocean park is on a mountain and their pathways are like sloping this way and that. You constantly have to climb uphill. It is so exhausting. I only took one exciting ride because my mum died after that one ride and I didn't want to ride anything alone. We sat on this space ride that goes like around in circle then it lifts you up 180 degrees and swings you around. It almost killed me too. My arms hurt so much from that stupid ride. At first I was wondering why all the people scream as they go upwards and not downwards because I thought isn't the scary part when you go down and feel like you're flying? During the ride I finally understand. When you go upwards 180 degrees straight up, it feels like if you don't hold on, you will fall off the seat. especially when you are upside down. It feels like hanging on to dear life. No wonder my hands ached like crazy. Well, it was worse for mum cause she got so dizzy and only felt better after vomitting. Dad keep telling mum that she's not young anymore so she shouldn't sit such rides.
After that one ride, nobody wanted to sit anymore rides.
So, we focused on the animals. Went to visit the Sea Jelly exhibition and its totally cool. The jellyfish are really beautiful floating around. Also went to see their aquarium. They have extremely big fishes there. It was pretty cool. I totally loved the sea turtle :D I even saw a shark egg case. Looks quite gross. Then we went to catch a dolphin and sealion show. The show was a bit disjointed but the animals were so cute so it was okay. After eating some KFC-wannabe meal that tasted like sandpaper, we went to sit the cable car to get to the lower section of the park. I SAW A PANDA LIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME. They were totally cute!!!! :D I so wanted to climb over to hug them. They are really greedy too. After they ate their biscuit and dranks their water, they went back to their enclosure, found a comfortable spot and started munching on leaves. ALOT OF LEAVES. They just sat there and kept on munching. Like as if they are having a eating leaves competition. Haha, totally cute <3 After that there was nothing interesting to do so we decided to move on to our next destination.
Next stop! The Peak!
First off, after alighting from the bus from Ocean Park, we had to walk a really long distance to get to the peak tram station. It was quite tiring walking there because you're walking uphill all the way -.- The peak tram was kinda cool. The hill or mountain or whatever you call it is like real steep and the tram just goes up like that. You kind of feel like you're riding on a rollercoaster except you never get to the part where it goes down. After a short ride, we arrived at the peak! It really is high up and you can see an amazing view of HongKong's cityscape :D Had dinner at Macdonalds and went up to the sky terrace to admire HongKong's night view. Super awesome view! It looks amazing from that high up. HongKong looks extremely pretty :D Everyone was squeezing around the edge trying to get nice photos. It felt a little scary though. I mean, I have this phobia of heights and I was that high up then. I could feel my legs turning jelly. Just so you know, jelly legs + tired legs = really wobbly legs. Couldn't stand being there for too long so we decided to head back to the hotel. On the way, shopped around the ladies market for one last time :D Didn't buy anything though. Tried their curry fishballs. HongKong people should really learn to eat more hot stuff. Their curry tastes like water :X
Day Four 25/06/09
Woke up later today because today is a slack day! Had Dim Sum breakfast at the same restaurant again :D We were going back to Macau today! Took the ferry back and had nice nap on the way... It was time to visit The Venetian Hotel. Took a shuttle bus from the jetty there. Decided not to have lunch at the hotel because it looked expensive. So we head on to the nearby TaiPa Village to have some authetic Portugese food at the Pinocchio restaurant. Another long walk to this village. Many shops were closed then and it look rather deserted. Even the restaurant only had like two other families eating there. The food was good though and really filling. Ate my first roasted pidgeon. Definitely tasted better than chicken :D We took a super long time to eat. By the time we finished eating, it was already... 4 pm? Oh well, made our way The Venetian Hotel after that. We walked for a really really really really long time before reaching. Haha, we were trying out a different route but ended up having to circle the whole hotel before finding the entrance. My dad was grumbling as we walked :D Took a few pictures cause the hotel was really nice. Then saw a family sitting a canoe or whatever you call it inside the hotel. This asian guy was rowing the boat and he really does sing quite well :D This group of China tourist saw him rowing while singing and they kept trying to catch his attention so they could take photos or something. They kept shouting "Hello!" to him while he was singing. I felt quite embarassed for them :X Entered a casino for the first time. Those gamblers were puffing away on their cigarettes in the air-conditioned room. Stinky! Was looking at them gamble but don't know how the games were played. Dad was like "Don't ask me this kind of things" when I asked him about the games. Was too full to have dinner so soon so we just went straight back to the hotel after that.
Day Five 26/06/09
Went to have breakfast at a nearby congee house before going to shop around Tai Sam Pa again. Bought two pairs of jeans from Giordano and a sesame street t-shirt from Bossini. Hehe, I love cookie monster! Their Giordano and Bossini have way cooler designs than in Singapore <3 Anyway, soo we were headed to the Macau tower for this expensive buffet lunch in the 360 rotating restaurant. Whoa, the restaurant is like on the 60th level! And it rotates 360 degrees too. So you're always having a different view outside while you eat. The buffet food was quite good. I loved the soba and this pork thingy which you can dip in 3 kinds of different mustards from different countries. French and England's mustard tasted like wasabi ._. Loved it still :D The cheese cake there is love! Haha, I loved their angel cake too, simple and nice. The view up there is also awesome. Somebody saw people bungee jumping halfway through their meal but we missed it cause it was too far away. But when we came out of the restaurant and was taking a breather outside, we witnessed people bungee jumping. Haha, we were just walking when we heard someone shouting "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Then we looked up and saw this guy falling from above. Quite interesting :D Went back to Tai Sam Pa to buy biscuit souveneirs and then grabbed our luggage from the hotel. The bus towards the airport from there took a freaking half an hour to come =.= Airport food there sucked. So expensive but not totally awesome. Hehe, wore a mask for the first time :D
And then it was back to Singapore!
How's that? Haha, I had fun :D
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, June 13, 2009 ; 10:12 AM {♥}
It's time for a transformation I say!
I shall work my very all since the future seems so dreary now. In order to change that I need a spell.
Transform myself! It's time for the lazy ass to change! Lift your butt up and get going lest the going gets you.
Can a lazy bum change into a workaholic?
We'll see...
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Sunday, May 31, 2009 ; 10:23 AM {♥}
EEK.
It's coming! I'm going! I'm scared >.< I'm really scared.
But at the end of this treacherous journey, there lies my dream, faith, and hope.
Don't look down on me until you see what I can become.
I will put in my all in growing and maturing.
I want to become greater and better.
And even though you don't know me yet.
You will get to know me.
Be unafraid to catch your dreams lest they dissolve into thin air, leaving no trail behind.
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Sunday, May 03, 2009 ; 9:54 PM {♥}
****
I screwed up again.
Stop slacking/procastinating!
Try harder you lazy ass.
Labels: diary
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, April 04, 2009 ; 10:44 AM {♥}
I'm sorry, Mr. Ng.
I'm sorry, Mrs. Wong.
I'm sorry, Mr. Lim.
I'm sorry, Mr. Teo.
I'm sorry, Mr. Iskandar.
I'm sorry, Mdm Sau.
I'm sorry, Nicholas.
I'm sorry, Javier.
I'm sorry, Si Hui.
I'm sorry, Benjamin.
I'm sorry, Jiamin.
I'm sorry, Isaac.
I'm sorry, Laura.
I'm sorry, Wei Ting.
I apologize to all the alumni too.
I failed. I couldn't do it. Couldn't make anyone proud of me.
To Nicholas Tan, I'm especially sorry.
Through all these times you've been with us. Taught us even though you could very well study for your A Levels. You've encouraged us. You've cared for us.
But I couldn't do anything to repay you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm very sorry. Sorry I couldn't get back the GWH for you. Sorry I couldn't even get a gold.
I don't know how to face you anymore.
To Mr. Ng and Mrs. Wong, I'm especially sorry too.
You loved us, cared for us, were concerned about us... But I couldn't reward your efforts. There is no GWH to give. Mr. Ng always scolded us before. But I know he was just concerned about us. He lost his sleep, always thinking about us and always making time to take us. He tried to teach us everything he knew. But why couldn't we become good enough? I'm sorry, Mr. Ng, I truly am. We have failed you. To Mrs. Wong, we couldn't give you the GWH even though you've stood by us. Everybody understands your love for this band and your love for all of us. We wanted to give you something in return for all the love and effort you put into us. We wanted to, but we failed.
I'm sorry to the both of you, really.
To all the alumnis, I don't know how to face you guys. We've ruined the DHSSB you created. We've brought it down to shambles. The GWH you've all worked so hard to achieve is now replaced by a mere silver. I am truly ashamed of myself. I am sorry. Really sorry...
I'm sorry to everybody who pinned high hopes on us.
There's no need to worry about me. I've fell and shed tears till my eyes run dry.
So now, it's time to climb back up. I want to climb even higher than before.
I hope Mr. Ng can give us another chance. Because we don't want to give up now. We want to continue this journey until we get the GWH. Please, give us another chance.
Senior High Band, I will definitely be a part of it.
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, March 07, 2009 ; 6:21 PM {♥}
Confidence: Belief in oneself and one's capabilities; self -reliance; assurance.
I am on a mission to retrieve it.
Jingjie, remember the old times? When I was just a year one, a newbie with nobody teaching me the ropes, how did I feel? In the past, I messed up, and messed up, and messed up... but I didn't give up. In the past, I was never recognized. Always the one sitting in that lonely corner, always the incompetent one, always the one who was outshone. At first, I felt depression. I was crying all the time. But when the tears are no longer able to wash away the pain, they dry up and lighted a fire within me. At that moment, I was thinking...
Do I really want to stay like this forever?
I wanted Mr. Ng to look at me. I wanted him to tell me I was good. I wanted him to smile at me with that pride written all over his face. I wanted him to accept me. I wanted others to accept me. I wanted them to look up to me and say
"Wow, that is Jingjie."
So I worked, and worked, and worked. I went for band everyday, smiling. This week I couldn't play this part, but the next week, I could. I climbed and climbed, even though I barely noticed, because I wasn't there yet. Then one day he was shocked by my improvement and he said: "Whoa, what did you eat?"
He was smiling at me. He was proud of me. He saw me for the first time in so long. I was there in front of him.
I was so happy.
If I could do it then... why did I give up now?
...I forgot this, but now I found it back, all of it.
Even though everybody says, you're not doing this for anyone but yourself, I want to do this for Mr. Ng. I want him to be even more proud of me. I don't want him to regret ever thinking that I was good. I want him to think that I'm even better.
I've been telling everybody that I play badly but I've never done anything about it. Why?
This is not the farthest I can go yet. I will continue paving ahead of me.
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Wednesday, March 04, 2009 ; 8:31 PM {♥}
I need to try harder :/
if I want to become a game designer for square enix/character desinger for studio ghibli and be in charge of the final fantasy projects/Hayao Miyazaki films.
Why is it so hard to become an anti-procastinator? Let's be more pro-active in work!
Today, I didn't go for full band. Sorry, I'll try to make it up :(
square enix. final fantasy. game designer. studio ghibli. character designer. computing. dreams & wishes unfufilled. How hard can I push myself to? Where will be the next stop?
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, February 28, 2009 ; 9:48 PM {♥}
Sick and tired of facing you.
Sick and tired of you telling me I'm not trying hard enough.
Sick and tired of watching you find excuses.
Sick and tired of hearing you say how much you love b**d
Sick and tired of you trying to force your way back into the world you no longer belong to.
Sick and tired of you, you and just you.
We used to be happy together, but now we're even happier without you.
You love the b**d but unfortunately, we don't love you back. And I bet you didn't even know that.
Under the covers, are you really sure about how we feel towards you?
The answer is no, but you don't know it.
tag replies.
Gavin// linked :D
MS. SOPHS// I'M NOT MS. JINX >.< and obviously gay fits me :D I'm GAY!
Isabel// linked :D JIA YOU FOR SYF! Loves your harp!
Binx2// It's okay, extreme gayness was what I was looking for :D Haha, are you trying to hint to me that you already found it?
Eli// JIA YOU TOO :D Loves cellos!
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, February 21, 2009 ; 9:14 PM {♥}
In an attempt to revamp my blog,
I've decided to go for a big change!
So there you have it! From EMO--------------> GAY!
Haha, I'm quite proud of this skin, ya know :D It fits me well, I think! I love the purple spider pattern in the background! So adorable :D
OOPS, look at the time! And I haven't started on homework :X
BUH-BYE!
Labels: diary
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Tuesday, February 17, 2009 ; 10:25 PM {♥}
My inner mind state is like a stretching rubber bung now. Hmm, wonders when it will snap.
These days, emotions have overrun my mind. Maybe it's because of stress or whatever, but, not all the emotions are bad :D
I got an idea for a new story that I'd like to try writing when I have time while I was on the bus (:
Anyway, I've decided to try to buck up! I want to master credentium! And perfect my tuning! Even though I don't know if I will quit band or not in year five (since you never know the future), I want to at least leave without regrets. I don't want to leave a mess for my juniors to clean up and just cheer them on, pinning on them all the hopes I have for the band to get back up.
I want to leave behind a legacy :/
I know it's hard, so I hope I can at least pull through. Doesn't matter if we get a gold or not. Just as long as I did my very best :D
Found this on Bin's facebook! Hope I can regain my lao niang spirit! Aja Aja Fighting!
tag replies:
MR. KENGS// Of course you like my blog song! I have good taste, okay? Haha,
bass trombone taste :DMS. SOPHS// YES, everybody kena influenced by me now. Even the seniors are
using MR. and MS :D Yay, little men and misses trombones!MS. WENS// haha, I used to have dog phobia too! But I think they're too cute
to resist in the end :DRosy// YESH, okay, NANA! I linked you :D And of course my dog is cute! Cuter
than Bin's :DBinBin// Are you sure?! You'd better start finding now then, I think you'll
take a long search :D
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, February 07, 2009 ; 4:29 PM {♥}
TADAA!
MS. JINGS is hereby officially introducing her new target: KIM SANG BUM :D
Even though I feel a little bad for all his other fans, BUT, nobody snatches from the great MS. JINGS :D
He's mine now :D
Labels: diary
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Sunday, February 01, 2009 ; 3:50 PM {♥}
Yeah man, I realized something after yesterday.
I'm a bitch, seriously.
Bitching about someone is extremely fun, especially about that someone. I don't know why but the things that you do, is stupidly and insanely funny. Well, I guess it's not good to talk behind someone's back so...
I shall start repenting now.
.
.
.
.
One second of repenting has been done.
.
.
.
.
Okay, I think I'm forgiven, right? At least I repented for one second :D I'm sure that's more than enough.
Okay! Ready for more bitching again!
Haha, anyway, had fun talking to everybody yesterday. It was so enjoyable...
Even though that ridiculous Auntie escaped without returning my beloved purple pencil, but still, it was a whole lot of fun.
I think I really bonded with my juniors yesterday :D It's these kind of things that make me feel more motivated for band. It makes me love my juniors more so I want to see them again soon! When's the next band practice man?
I've decided. I shall stay if my juniors do too! They're just too adorable to abandon, haha.
Realized that I haven't ever posted a picture of my Sora for you guys...
so here you go!
BUH-BYE!
Labels: diary, rambles, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Friday, January 16, 2009 ; 9:26 PM {♥}
I don't how many times I have been saying this but...
Please help yourselves and help us.
At least give us a reason to work. If you don't work hard, we can't bring ourselves to do it either. If you tell me you're tired, I can say the same thing. At the very least, be willing, so that we can do our best to help you.
This is a challenge. And you have the responsibility to rise up to the occasion.
Please help us all. Be the hero, save everyone.
Our chance lies in your hands. Give us a chance and give yourself a chance too.
Labels: diary, rambles, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, January 03, 2009 ; 8:42 PM {♥}
Happy Belated New Year to everybody!
I'm kind of on a movie craze now, but I did do some homework! I swear :D
Today was yet another reflective day, and I got really touched by someone.
As I was baking new year pineapple tarts for you people with my mum, we starting talking... And I was telling her about band randomly. I somehow feel relief when I think about how I started in band.
I remember(and so does my mum remember) the days I spent crying at first. There was the "guides problem" and the loneliness of a newcomer. I remember grappling with the mere basics of my trombone playing as I sat at that lonely corner of the classroom, watching and envying the group of trombones sitting so far away. The strong and grand sounds of the trombone choir touched my heart and I kept trying my best, hoping I could be that good one day. I remember when Nicholas used to teach me and how I used to dislike him at first(no offence).
I still remember what he said once. "You don't compare my sound with yours. I played for three years and you are just starting."
It actually motivated me. At that moment, I really want to try my best to shake off that beginner label that branded me.
I remember the times when everyone was too busy preparing for SYF to care about me. The times when I feel lost because nobody taught me anything new. And I even remember when Mr Tan came to visit me once. I was so touched by him. I still remember what he said to me. Those words of encouragement, I will never forget.
Then it was during this lonely time, when the gods probably took pity of me and sent me light. The year ones came, four of them, four newbies, just like me. I remember how excited I was to teach them. I also remember how awkward it was at first. They were so hardworking and quiet and I had to keep thinking of jokes to tell them because there was nothing to break the ice with. Gradually, though I can't remember how, we grew closer and now they talk so much and are so intimate with me. They are like my children cause I taught them(not to act old or anything). Thank you, Keng Heng, Sophin, Wenlin and Chervelle. You probably didn't know but you brought new meaning to my boring band life.
Then everything started to get better. I started to improve and I started to get accepted. I remember the time when I grew so quickly that even Mr. Ng took notice.
"What did you eat?" I remember him teasing me during one rehearsal. Words like "The third stand is the most important, that's why I put you in bass trombone" lighted my heart ablaze with fire even though I knew that in his heart, I could never compare to that someone no matter what.
I'm thankful that I'm reminded of this today. I think I kind of forgot all this. Like I had buried it underneath the fighting and bitching I have done in the past year.
And just now, my mum told me this.
"Do you want us to come for your concert this year?" I was stunned.
"That day when we went to your senior's concert, dad asked me why I didn't come to watch you perform. He said I should support you." I could feel my tears welling up when I heard this.
Thank you, Dad, thank you, Mum. You've done so much for me by giving me support.
And once again, a very happy new year to you all. I wish for health and happiness for all my loved ones, family and friends.
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Tuesday, December 30, 2008 ; 12:11 AM {♥}
Thank god for family :D
Recently, all that pent up stressed finally found its solace. After I blurted out everything to my family I feel so relieved! And not to mention how glad I was to find that they are behind me all the way.
I shall try not to bow down to her anymore.
My whole family just keep telling me how I should stand up to her. Put her in her place or whatever. Even my mum said she's a bitch. Like can you believe that?!
MY MUM said the word BITCH. It's like weird and funny to hear her say that. Okay, maybe she didn't really say "bitch", but she said the chinese equivalent of it, me thinks.
Oh no, I shouldn't say "me thinks" anymore because it's what that head girl Harriet keeps saying in the movie "Wild Child". Just finished watching it and it's awesome! Somehow, I think the guy is quite the hottie :D Good thing the female lead is a prettyface or it would be so unfair.
I realise that I do prefer British accent to American. It sounds good, no? Like how they would say "scottish" as "scott-ish". That's like so cute... in a weird sense.
Anyway, tomorrow's band activity will be really tiring. I DON'T WANT TO DO IT. I'M NOT FREE LABOUR!
I might just sue the band for child labour someday. It's killing me.
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Saturday, December 20, 2008 ; 10:21 PM {♥}
Sometimes, I can't shake the feeling that I'm too easily influenced.
I could be dead sure about something for a moment and the next thing you know it, I doubt myself when someone tells me the opposite.
Like a river which flows into many directions, never knowing which one was the correct path. Would life be different for me if I didn't make those choices? I could believe this is the right way to go and when other people talk, I turn away towards the other direction.
Is that a good thing? Or a bad thing? It's as if the society conforms me. But then, I don't want to lose my sense of self. Will "I" fade away into nothingness?
I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore -.-
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Friday, December 12, 2008 ; 7:15 PM {♥}
Did you ever wish you were another person, leading another life?
I just felt like that this evening.
I was walking down the road pretending to be another person again. Like I wasn't Zhong Jingjie. Wasn't a Singaporean. Wasn't a Dunmanian. Didn't play the trombone. Didn't live in Punggol. Didn't have a good friend turned bad. Didn't bitch about her after that.
And it's not like we all don't know what I'm talking about. But then again, I don't feel like Ms. Nice today and don't feel like doing that "Let's-put-on-big-fake-smileys-and-try-to-pretend-nothing-happened-although-we-all-know-the-world-changed"
Sometimes, it's so tiring doing something that you don't like. It's like reading a very hard book and trying even harder to make sense of those unidentifiable words that go on forever. Like trying to make any sense of why I'm even playing this game of pretend with you. Even when the whole world knows what the hell is going on.
Well, suck it up.
Because I can't put up this happy facade forever when I ain't no Elmo. And that's that.
Labels: diary, rambles, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
Tuesday, November 04, 2008 ; 10:35 PM {♥}
I love this song so much, I'm going to post the lyrics here so that I can sing it!
粉雪 Konayuki
-Remioromen.
konayuki mau kisetsu wa itsumo surechigai
hitogomi ni magiretemo onaji sora
miteru noni
kaze ni fukarete nitayou ni kogoeru noni
Season of snow powder always come
Although we are mixed up with a mass of people
we are looking on the same sky
Blown by the wind, and we are chilled by it
boku wa kimi no subete nado shittewa inai darou
soredemo ichiokunin kara kimi
wo mitsuketayo
konkyo wa naikedo honki de omotterunda
I may not know everything about you
Nevertheless, I've found you among 100 million of
people
There's no proof but I'm very serious of it
sasai na iiai mo nakute onaji jikan wo ikitenado ikenai
sunao ni narenai nara
yorokobi mo kanashimi mo munashiidake
It's impossible to live in the same time with no single quarrel
If we can't be honest, happiness and sadness are just meaningless
konayuki nee kokoro made shiroku somerareta nara
futari no kodoku wo wakeau
koto ga dekitano kai?
If the snow powder may whiten deep to our heart
Could we both share our loneliness?
boku wa kimi no kokoro ni mimi wo oshiatete
sono koe no suru hou e sutto
fukaku made
orite yukitai soko de mou ichido aou
I would press my ear near to your heart
And go down deep into the place where I hear that voice and meet you once again
wakari aitai nante uwabe
wo nadeteita nowa boku no hou
kimi no kajikanda
te mo nigiri
shimeru koto dakede tsunagatteitanoni
We want to understand each other
It's me who softly brush the surface
Just by tightly gripping your numb and cold hand
We are tied to each other
konayuki nee eien wo mae ni amarini moroku
zaratsuku asufaruto no ue shimi ni
natte yukuyo
Snow powder is too fragile
In front of us, keep on leaving stains on the rough asphalt forever
konayuki nee toki ni tayori naku kokoro wa yureru
soredemo boku wa kimi no
koto mamori tsuzuketai
Snow powder doesnot rely on time, moving our heart
Nevertheless, I'd still like to keep on protecting you
konayuki nee kokoro made shiroku somerareta nara
futari no kodoku wo
tsutsunde sora ni kaesu kara
If the snow powder may whiten deep to our heart
It will cover both our loneliness and return it to the sky...
粉雪舞う季節はいつもすれ違い
人ごみに紛れても同じ空見てるのに
風に吹かれて似たように凍えるのに
僕は君のすべてなど知ってはいないだろう
それでも一億人から君を見つけたよ
根拠はないけど本気で思ってるんだ
些細な言い合いもなくて同じ時間を生きてなどいけない
素直になれないなら喜びも悲しみも空しいだけ
僕は君の心に耳を押し当てて
その声のする方へすっと深くまで 降りてゆきたいそこでもう一度会おう
分かり合いたいなんて 上辺を撫でていた（なでていた）のは僕のほう
君の悴んだ（かじかんだ）手も握り閉めることだけで繋がってたのに
粉雪ねえ永遠を前にあまりに脆く
ざらつくアスファルトの上染みになってゆくよ
粉雪ねえ時に頼りなく心は揺れる
それでも僕は君のこと守り続けたい
粉雪ねえ心まで白く染められたなら
２人の孤独を包んで空に返すから
Labels: diary, rambles, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
; 10:08 PM {♥}
One Litre of Tears has inspired me.
I won't say how much because I haave yet to feel the extent of its inspiration but at least it got me thinking.
Not about angsty things like death.
And it's no longer about the future that I had claimed to be oh-so-bleak.
It made me think about...
The present and what I should do about it.
I want to have a fufilling life. And I sort of envied Aya-chan in this sense. Her life though short, was fufilling and impactful. My life is just one heck of lazyness. I obviously want to find my goal in life but before I do, I want to do something about this one heck of lazyness. Because I realised that if I don't change now, by the time I found my goal in life, I might not be able to strive towards it anymore.
I feel that lazyness will take hold of me. Slowly, but surely, it will make me lose my will, like it already had.
I want to learn to work hard. I want to learn to be responsible. I want to learn to persevere. I want to learn to be serious.
But sometimes, I find myself, making all these resolutions to be better but in the end forgetting all of them as if they were just a dream.
I hate saying "It's okay to do badly this year because it's not so important yet. I will do better next year because next year, it's important" to myself. They are just excuses. Empty words with no truth within.
I realised that I might not be able to work hard and strive for next year as much as I'd wish to. Lazyness is taking over me like a drug addiction. And it's hard quitting slacking like it's hard quitting smoking. The toxic is spreading over me, I can feel it.
And I want to change. I want to stop the addiction. I want to become the better person that I always dreamed of.
I know the road ahead is full of thorns and rocks that will slow me down and trip me. And I know that this might just be another resolution to forget later. But I've made it a point to try my best to endure and to remember whenever I can. "1リットルの涙" will remind me of my pormise to myself.
I promised myself, that I will try my best to work hard.
And I don't want to betray even myself by breaking that promise. At least, I want to stay true to myself. I want to show the world that even I, can keep a promise to myself.
がんばっていきまっしょい, Jayちゃん!
Labels: diary, sentimentals
Yours sincerely, MS. JINGS {♥}
